How to get emotional with a girl
An emotional connection is one of those fleeting, powerful things that can seem all too rare and all too outside one's control. It can seem like it's just chance when you happen upon one -- as if but by the grace of God it came into being. But it doesn't have to be. Just like succeeding with women in general -- just like figuring out how to launch businesses and succeed financially -- just like anything in life -- the ability to build an emotional connection is something that can be learned. Most people don't like to hear that. Most people want to think that all in life is pure happenstance and nothing other than fate determines the outcome of their lives.SEE VIDEO BY TOPIC: How To Open Your Woman Emotionally
8 Ways to Build an Emotional Connection with a Woman
Last Updated on November 28, To love and be loved. Love, acceptance, respect, to be desired, security, passion, are all things we may want in a relationship.
There are certainly others and each person has specific desires. What I want to focus on here is the aspect of emotional safety in relationships.
How we feel in terms of safe may have more than a thousand factors from our history with parents, childhood friends, eppi-genitics, attachment style, heartbreak, and the influence of movies and books or our belief system narratives.
Aside from the the basic survival instincts in our biology that generate fears, we develop another layer of emotional safety, or insecurity in our social relationships. In my experience women are more alert to the issue of being alone, while men more fear criticism from their partner.
In any case, to feel secure we will have to overcome these historical patterns in our beliefs and nervous system either way. In short, there are multiple factors as to why we might feel unsafe in our relationship, and what we need to work through to create a feeling of safety.
She can communicate honestly, be herself, and feel emotionally safe. Sometimes a woman will trade one of these comforts for another in her relationship. Sometimes her history with men, or because of experiences growing up, she will develop a belief system that inhibits her from feeling really safe. A woman will feel emotionally safe with a man who is emotionally available, honest, trustworthy and authentic. These are emotional character strengths she can respect and admire in a man. A man of character and emotional depth is a man who knows who he is and likes himself.
His love for himself is so strong he does not need to gain the acceptance of others by trying to be something he is not. His strength is not physical so much as it is in the clarity of his mind and emotions. These are character strengths that a woman not only admires, but feels safe with. He is not a weak man that will bend to the whims of other people. She can trust him to be who he is. I describe this kind of man as being in his emotional integrity.
It probably sounds as if a woman can feel emotionally safe with this consciously aware man. A different factor for women that creates safety is her trust that the relationship is solid and will work out. When a man spends time doing activities as simple as cleaning house and cooking together it sends a message that he is committed to being with her. It is wasteful to invest her time with someone that may be gone soon.
You want to know if your prospective partner has the capacity and willingness to match you for a deeper emotional commitment. There is also the fear that if after getting emotionally invested in a man there will be a break up. It makes sense for us to wonder where the relationship is going. She wants to avoid the emotions associated with being alone.
This kind of safety is really about protecting herself from the painful emotions that come from break up and being alone. When a man is distant emotionally or physically from her, is out late with his guy friends without updating her, it may bring up feelings of loneliness, or fear of a break up. Fears and insecurity in relationship takes a woman out of her emotional integrity. In order to avoid her fears of being alone the woman may make efforts to keep her man close.
It might be a criticism for going out with the boys for an evening. By discouraging him to do other things she is increasing their time together. A critical comment is a means to reject his behavior so he would avoid criticism in the future.
Being sad is a way for the man to notice her and get what she wants. If there is a lot of emotional charge the dynamic might include anger or jealousy. He might also take it as a sign that it is time to grow into a mature relationship.
If a woman engages in patterns of anger, jealousy, sadness etc, and is successful in controlling her man she will have influenced his behavior by her emotional reactions.
With influence over his emotions she will have influence over what he does with his time. He will learn to avoid the activities that bring emotional reactions and criticism and do the things that she approves of. They will spend more time together which will help her to feel solid in the relationship. It also distracts herself from the fear of being alone. In one part of her mind she has helped their relationship, but she may have unknowingly created a separate feeling of not being safe.
She will see him as someone that gives up his interests, runs around trying to make her happy. He has stopped being his authentic self and started being what she wants him to be. At some level she perceives him as no longer being his own man. She could perceive him as having weak character and could lose some respect for him. More importantly she will not feel safe with a man she sees as having a weak character. Some women will conclude that if they can control their man then other women will also be able to control and influence him as well.
All of this adds up to losing respect and trust in the man for these reasons, all the while feeling safer because of getting more time and attention. One assumption sometimes deep in the mind is that the stronger person controls the weaker person. If she can direct him then he must be weaker than her. This image of weakness is amplified if the woman already considers her self as weak to begin with.
On the one hand the woman has driven her man to be near her so that she can feel secure in the relationship. On the other hand because she now, consciously, or unconsciously, perceives her man to be controlled by her emotional reactions she no longer sees him as a solid foundation of strength. The desire to spend time with a partner to have fun and create together can be completely authentic. When in her emotional integrity the sense of safety she feels is normal because together they are a stronger force than if she were alone.
She is out of her emotional integrity when her motivation for time together is for protection from fears of being alone. A woman in her emotional integrity is free to ask for what she wants, and that includes spending time with her partner.
It can is difficult to discern whether we are acting on behalf of a desire to be with someone, or avoiding a fear of being alone. The situation appears impossible. If the man acquiesces he may appear weak to her. For the woman it is also impossible. If she works to keep the man close she is acting out of fear and runs the risk of being controlling and losing respect for herself and her man.
It only looks impossible if we limit our options to the impulsive strategies of control. If we are to find happiness in our relationships it will require dissolving the beliefs and assumptions that create the painful fears and controlling behaviors. We will have to seek an emotional solution beyond what the mind offers as safety from fear. What if there was another way? In a conscious relationship, where both partners are committed to growing out of their childhood beliefs and past relationship baggage you have other options.
It involves the bold, and liberating act of sharing with your emotions and thoughts in a way that is without judgment of yourself, or them. Making a full disclosure puts your fears and thought out there in front of your partner and will feel vulnerable. It will also be liberating from the effort you spend hiding them and compensating for them.
To do this you will need to set up a safe communication practice and trust. You will need to meet each other in a way that is accepting of this process of emptying out your baggage, not in an effort to control your partner, but so that you can unburden and free yourself from it. The purpose of this honest communication is to help identify and break the beliefs and emotions trapping you in drama. The fears of being alone are coupled with assumptions and other associated beliefs.
Those beliefs usually involve not being good enough, unworthy, self rejection, and other people rejecting us. This is the painful emotion that people are seeking protection and safety from. These beliefs are lies that we carry in our relationship baggage. There have been many times when we have been alone and been happy. We have just learned to associate being alone with lonely, and then with misery.
When core beliefs of self rejection are dissolved there is no longer fear of being alone and there is ample room for self acceptance and self love. Changing beliefs also eliminates the need and behavior of being controlling to your partner. Great Love thrives in the absence of fear. He might respond to the request of his woman just because he loves her and desires her to be happy. In this way he is completely in his emotional integrity.
However a man that is uncomfortable with her reactions or feels guilty may respond the same way but is out of his emotional integrity. Even though his actions to be with her are the same the motivations are different. Men are highly aware and sensitive to how their female partner speak of them.
A harsh word or criticism can be crushing. Something as simple as a smile is going to feel like a load of love and acceptance supporting them. If a man feels like he will be criticized, he will shut down and avoid sharing. If he is sharing about a struggle at work and is sad or angry a woman may feel that she is on his side if she gets sympathetically sad or angry as well. This may seem compassionate or empathetic but it is far off the mark. It is to share more fully but in a more healthy way.
More complete sharing would be to notice his impulse to share less.
Emotional Intelligence in Love and Relationships
This trick helped me a lot. Hope it would help you too. I had a huge crush on this girl,I would daily see her in the morning at a park running with a set of earphones and her phone strapped to her arm. Her dog too used to run with her all the time wagging its tail.
In fact, there was a big selling book called Men Are From Mars and Women Are From Venus which spelled out very clearly what makes men different from women. These differences can cause so much confusion for people involved in a relationship. That may be a reason why so many more men end up with heart attacks… they tend to hold everything inside. While every person is different, women tend to be more emotional than men. Each person brings who they are, including their masculinity or femininity, and that helps balance out their relationship.
Emotional safety in relationships
How to handle emotional women
Simple, right? So you post a video on Facebook that depicts you eating insects on your last Thailand vacation and hope she clicks the Like button — for many men an obvious sign of attraction! S dollars on you or there is no freaking way in hell you are leaving with that delicious looking watermelon. No matter how many shells, or buttons, or fishbones you try to pay with, the cashier will never accept the wrong currency.
This is highly stressful because it also requires you to be hyper-vigilant and in a constant state of defense for incoming attacks. For thousands of years there have always been issues when it comes to understanding the opposite sex. It is a widespread belief that women are guided by their emotions rather than rational thinking.
Conversation Tips For Emotional Women
As long as he is achieving his goals or getting what he wants, he can turn a blind eye and not care. However, for the most part, what you will find is that women are much more compassionate and caring than most men. Of course, there have always been nice, loving, caring, feeling men who have fought for change, tolerance and love. However, for the most part, when it was just men ruling the world, there was less compassion, tolerance and love for fellow human beings.
Emotional intelligence EQ is the secret of lasting intimate relationships, largely because it makes us extremely aware of the changes—large and small—that are constantly occurring in ourselves and others. We have the potential to attain the kind of love we all dream of—deep intimacy, mutual kindness, real commitment, soulful caring—simply because of empathy, our innate ability to share emotional experience. We have the potential to attain the kind of love we all dream of —deep intimacy and mutual kindness, real committed, soulful caring—simply because of empathy and our innate ability to share emotional experience. But to achieve those relationship goals, we need all the skills of a high EQ:. In fact, for many people, falling in love serves as motivation for reeducating the heart. When you ride out your fear of change, you discover that different does not necessarily mean worse.
Why Do Women Handle Emotions Differently Than Men
A famous psychologist once said "humans are attracted to each other's rough edges". The very thought of it may send a sharp tingling sensation up your spine. These people are true unicorns, who not only dare to feel, but express it, too. That said, emotions have a bad rep, but in the pages ahead we will look at why girls who are too emotional actually make the best wives. We will shed some light on different scenarios a girl will typically find herself in at home , during conflict , out with friends , communication , and finally on vacation.
Ему была видна задняя дверца: как это принято в Севилье, она оставалась открытой - экономичный способ кондиционирования. Все внимание Беккера сосредоточилось на открытой двери, и он забыл о жгучей боли в ногах. Задние колеса уже остались за спиной - огромные, доходящие ему до плеч скаты, вращающиеся все быстрее и быстрее.
А как же автоматическое отключение. Стратмор задумался. - Должно быть, где-то замыкание. Желтый сигнал тревоги вспыхнул над шифровалкой, и свет, пульсируя, прерывистыми пятнами упал налицо коммандера.
Подождите! - закричал Ролдан. - Не надо впутывать сюда полицию. Вы говорите, что находитесь в центре, верно.
Так он и. Очередь из десяти человек, толкотня и крик.
Стратмор пока не сказал ей, что этот ключ представляет для него отнюдь не только академический интерес. Он думал, что сможет обойтись без ее участия - принимая во внимание ее склонность к самостоятельности - и сам найдет этот ключ, но уже столкнулся с проблемами, пытаясь самостоятельно запустить Следопыта.
Рисковать еще раз ему не хотелось. - Сьюзан, - в его голосе послышалась решимость, - я прошу тебя помочь мне найти ключ Хейла.
- Если вы позвоните, она умрет. Стратмора это не поколебало. - Я готов рискнуть. - Чепуха. Вы жаждете обладать ею еще сильнее, чем Цифровой крепостью. Я вас знаю. На такой риск вы не пойдете.
Она сейчас наверняка уже над Атлантикой. Беккер взглянул на часы. Час сорок пять ночи.